英语翻译We often feel that we have no real "choice" about many a
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英语翻译
We often feel that we have no real "choice" about many aspects of our lives.In fact,as I look back,I realize that I spent many years living by "assumption" - never really feeling like I was making choices.Part of this was because I was focusing on whatever I was "giving up" instead of what I was "getting" from the path I took.
But in fact,we have a great deal more choice than we think.It's just that ALL choices involved trade-offs,and we're constantly determining within ourselves which trade-offs we can best live with.So we are always "choosing" - even though it may not feel like it.
When confronted with the idea that we're choosing how to live our lives,our first reaction may be "Yes,But?- as we point out all the barriers that prevent us from living our lives by choice.Some of the most common reasons/excuses include:1) our past history,2) our relationships,3) uncontrollable events,4) conflicting goals,5) money constraints,and 6) our "image" of who we are.
1) Our Past History is often blamed for a lot of our problems - because we feel the "baggage" we carry from our childhood has "made us the way we are" and limited our options in life.However,I'm very fond of a statement from transactional analysis that says:"Who you are may be your parents' fault; but if you stay that way,it's your own fault."
2) Our Relationships (especially as women) tend to lead us to feel that we sacrifice our personal desires for the sake of others - when,in fact,this kind of "sacrifice" often simply represents the fact that our "desire" to feel that we are a "supportive/nurturing/responsible person" is greater than our "desire" for whatever personal goal we feel we're sacrificing - which means we're actually choosing what is MOST important to us personally.
3) Uncontrollable Events tend to feel like they take away all choice - in that we certainly wouldn't choose some of the difficult issues we face in life.However,even in the midst of uncontrollable events,we have a choice as to how to RESPOND to them.(For instance,I've been kidded about the fact that instead of spending the rest of my life silently suffering about my husband's affairs many years ago - I wound up "making a career out of it" by working to help others.Clearly,I DID make a choice.)
4) Conflicting Goals,another seemingly insurmountable obstacle to making choices,is simply the point at which the idea of "trade-offs" comes in.(You can have most "anything" you want,but not "everything" - at least not at the same time.) This just means that you choose between conflicting goals based on identifying and acting in accordance with your personal values and priorities.
We often feel that we have no real "choice" about many aspects of our lives.In fact,as I look back,I realize that I spent many years living by "assumption" - never really feeling like I was making choices.Part of this was because I was focusing on whatever I was "giving up" instead of what I was "getting" from the path I took.
But in fact,we have a great deal more choice than we think.It's just that ALL choices involved trade-offs,and we're constantly determining within ourselves which trade-offs we can best live with.So we are always "choosing" - even though it may not feel like it.
When confronted with the idea that we're choosing how to live our lives,our first reaction may be "Yes,But?- as we point out all the barriers that prevent us from living our lives by choice.Some of the most common reasons/excuses include:1) our past history,2) our relationships,3) uncontrollable events,4) conflicting goals,5) money constraints,and 6) our "image" of who we are.
1) Our Past History is often blamed for a lot of our problems - because we feel the "baggage" we carry from our childhood has "made us the way we are" and limited our options in life.However,I'm very fond of a statement from transactional analysis that says:"Who you are may be your parents' fault; but if you stay that way,it's your own fault."
2) Our Relationships (especially as women) tend to lead us to feel that we sacrifice our personal desires for the sake of others - when,in fact,this kind of "sacrifice" often simply represents the fact that our "desire" to feel that we are a "supportive/nurturing/responsible person" is greater than our "desire" for whatever personal goal we feel we're sacrificing - which means we're actually choosing what is MOST important to us personally.
3) Uncontrollable Events tend to feel like they take away all choice - in that we certainly wouldn't choose some of the difficult issues we face in life.However,even in the midst of uncontrollable events,we have a choice as to how to RESPOND to them.(For instance,I've been kidded about the fact that instead of spending the rest of my life silently suffering about my husband's affairs many years ago - I wound up "making a career out of it" by working to help others.Clearly,I DID make a choice.)
4) Conflicting Goals,another seemingly insurmountable obstacle to making choices,is simply the point at which the idea of "trade-offs" comes in.(You can have most "anything" you want,but not "everything" - at least not at the same time.) This just means that you choose between conflicting goals based on identifying and acting in accordance with your personal values and priorities.
我们经常认为,我们没有真正的"choice" 关于许多我们的生活的方面.实际上,当我看,我意识到,我度过了许多岁月居住在"assumption" 旁边; - 从未真正地感觉如我做出选择.一部分的这是因为我集中于什么我"giving up" 代替什么我是"getting" 从道路我采取了.但实际上,我们比我们认为非常有挑选.所有选择介入交易的It's,和we're 经常确定在我们自己心头哪种交易我们能最好居住与.如此我们总是"choosing" - 即使它不能感觉象.何时与想法面对,we're 选择怎么居住我们的生活,我们的第一反应也许是"Yes,- 因为我们指出防止我们居住我们的生活由选择的所有障碍.一些最共同的reasons/excuses 有:1) 我们的历史、2) 我们的关系、3) 无法控制的事件、4) 矛盾的目标、5) 金钱限制,和6) 我们的"image" 谁我们是.1) 我们的历史由于很多经常被责备我们的问题- 因为我们感觉"baggage" 我们运载从我们的童年有"made 我们方式我们are" 并且限制我们的选择在生活中.但是,I'm 非常喜欢一个声明从认为的交易上的分析:您是的"Who 也许是您的parents' 缺点; 但如果您停留那样,it's 您自己的fault." 2) 我们的关系(特别是作为妇女) 倾向于带领我们认为,我们牺牲我们的个人欲望为其他人-当,实际上,这"sacrifice" 经常简单地代表我们的"desire" 的事实; 认为,我们是"supportive/nurturing/responsible person" 大于我们的"desire" 为任何个人目标我们感觉we're 牺牲- 意味we're 实际上选择什么亲自是最重要对我们.3) 无法控制的事件倾向于感觉如他们拿走所有选择- 我们wouldn't 一定选择一些难题我们面对在生活中.但是,在无法控制的事件中间,我们有一个选择至于怎样反应他们.(例如,I've 被哄骗关于事实而不是度过剩余我的生活沈默地遭受关于我的husband's 事理许多岁月前- I 受伤"making 事业出于it" 由工作帮助其他人.清楚地,我做出了一个选择.)
4) 相冲突目标,对做出选择的其它表面上不可逾越的障碍,简单地是"trade-offs" 想法的点;进来.(您能有多数"anything" 您要,但不是"everything" - 至少不同时.) 这意味,您选择在矛盾的目标之间根据辨认和行动与您的个人价值和优先权符合.
4) 相冲突目标,对做出选择的其它表面上不可逾越的障碍,简单地是"trade-offs" 想法的点;进来.(您能有多数"anything" 您要,但不是"everything" - 至少不同时.) 这意味,您选择在矛盾的目标之间根据辨认和行动与您的个人价值和优先权符合.
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