用翻译标准评析西游记篇尾曲的文章
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用翻译标准评析西游记篇尾曲的文章
卷号:(A) (2012年12月)绝密
湖北师范学院辅修期末考试试卷
英汉翻译(10级)
考试范围
Chapter1--4
命题人
张小胜
院系
外国语学院
考试形式
论文
课程类别
必修
学 期
20122
专业
英语
大题号
一
二
三
四
五
六
班级
经管1002班
满 分
100
学号
64
得 分
姓名
刘杨
阅卷人
总分
(注意:请务必将所有答案填写在答题纸上)
本题得分
I. Thesis (100 points)
Directions: Write a short thesis about the following topic. The thesis shall be no more than 800 words printed or written on 16k printing paper. Typeface of Times New Roman and type size of 12 is required respectively.
Topic:
“Where is my road”(敢问路在何方), extremely popular as a ending song of TV series “Western Journey”(西游记), has several English versions, one of which is given below. Based on the translation criteria discussed in class, you should make some analysis and comment about the following English translation of the song. Please hand in your thesis before the first of January in 2013
The English version: Where is my road?
you are carrying burden
I am leading a horse
receiving sunrise
saying good-bye to sunset
overcoming hardships
walking on avenue
finish fighting sufferings
geting going again
geting going again
come come come
a series of changes of seasons
you taste bitterness and happiness
dare to ask where is road
the road under foot
My analysis about “where is my road”
—Liuyang
“Where is my road”, extremely popular as the ending song of TV series “Western Journey”, has several English versions, I will appreciate one of the English versions of it based on Yanfu’s translation criteria “faithfulness, expressiveness, and elegance” and my own understanding.
Faithfulness: I will analysis this version from two aspects based on this criterion.
On the one hand, this translation gives a complete transcript of the ideas of the original work, the style and manner of writing in the translation is mostly of the same character with that of the original, for example, it used antithesis which is the same as the original text’ figure of speech, such as “you and I” “carrying and leading” “receiving and saying”, this make the translation text vivid, and make readers feel the same with the original readers.
On the other hand, it still has some drawbacks in my eyes. First of all, it did not faithful to the original text’s figure of speech sometimes. for example, the original text used“一番番”and“一场场”,but the translation work didn’t reflect the antithesis, secondly, I think the subject of the sentence should be “we” instead of “you”, because in the first sentence of the lyric ,it have mentioned the subject is “you” and “I”. thirdly, I think translate the onomatopoetic words“啊” into“ah”will be more faithful compared with“come,come,come”.what’s more, I think the last sentences should add a predicate“ is”, it will be more faithful, because the original text have predicate“在”.
Expressiveness: Sometimes, the first principle is held to at the sacrifice of expressiveness and elegance, but this English version has done a very good job, it combined the three principles together, based on faithfulness, nearly all culture elements in the original text have been well reflected, and keep almost all features of the original text.
It sufficiently expresses Sangzang and his disciples’ spirit during their journey to the west to get the Buddhist scriptures in India. Their hardship suffered on the journey, and their courage, faith, and optimism give us great encouragement. This translation has expressed the original text’s spirit very well.
However, there are several points I have to mention, which I don’t think is pretty good. Maybe that’s the contradiction between the two criteria; it’s hard to achieve every single criterion. The translation of”踏平坎坷,成大道”is “overcoming hardship, walking on avenue” I think the original text wants to express that they have suffer a lot and overcame many difficulties, and then, they turn all this difficulties into the walking road to help them in the journey to the west, the original meaning is not walking on avenue, so the translation use “turning it into avenue” will be more appropriate. In addition to that, we all know this text is a lyric, so it can sing by us, when we sing the translated English lyric, it does not sound good.
Elegance: I think this English version put priority on this criterion. I appreciate it very much. First one, we can see that the original text is no more than fifty words, and this English version is also less than fifty English words, it is hard to complete! One of the features of Chinese is succinct, only one words can express a lot of meaning, so does this lyric, but this translation have express all the meaning within very few words. Secondly, the majority of the translation used the present tence.It use phrase instead of sentence, use words instead of phrase, which avoid complicated and overloaded, and made the translation as succinct as the original text.
Conclusion: With the influence of Chinese’s unique habitant, religion, tradition and value, cultural difference have being formed in history between Chinese and western audience. In the translation of Chinese literary works, we need to concern about the difference of two different cultures; on the translation of this lyric, it’s a difficult work to express all the meaning of the text. We have to combine the three criteria together. Although this English version did not translate perfectly, it’s still a good version for foreigner to know more about Chinese culture.
湖北师范学院辅修期末考试试卷
英汉翻译(10级)
考试范围
Chapter1--4
命题人
张小胜
院系
外国语学院
考试形式
论文
课程类别
必修
学 期
20122
专业
英语
大题号
一
二
三
四
五
六
班级
经管1002班
满 分
100
学号
64
得 分
姓名
刘杨
阅卷人
总分
(注意:请务必将所有答案填写在答题纸上)
本题得分
I. Thesis (100 points)
Directions: Write a short thesis about the following topic. The thesis shall be no more than 800 words printed or written on 16k printing paper. Typeface of Times New Roman and type size of 12 is required respectively.
Topic:
“Where is my road”(敢问路在何方), extremely popular as a ending song of TV series “Western Journey”(西游记), has several English versions, one of which is given below. Based on the translation criteria discussed in class, you should make some analysis and comment about the following English translation of the song. Please hand in your thesis before the first of January in 2013
The English version: Where is my road?
you are carrying burden
I am leading a horse
receiving sunrise
saying good-bye to sunset
overcoming hardships
walking on avenue
finish fighting sufferings
geting going again
geting going again
come come come
a series of changes of seasons
you taste bitterness and happiness
dare to ask where is road
the road under foot
My analysis about “where is my road”
—Liuyang
“Where is my road”, extremely popular as the ending song of TV series “Western Journey”, has several English versions, I will appreciate one of the English versions of it based on Yanfu’s translation criteria “faithfulness, expressiveness, and elegance” and my own understanding.
Faithfulness: I will analysis this version from two aspects based on this criterion.
On the one hand, this translation gives a complete transcript of the ideas of the original work, the style and manner of writing in the translation is mostly of the same character with that of the original, for example, it used antithesis which is the same as the original text’ figure of speech, such as “you and I” “carrying and leading” “receiving and saying”, this make the translation text vivid, and make readers feel the same with the original readers.
On the other hand, it still has some drawbacks in my eyes. First of all, it did not faithful to the original text’s figure of speech sometimes. for example, the original text used“一番番”and“一场场”,but the translation work didn’t reflect the antithesis, secondly, I think the subject of the sentence should be “we” instead of “you”, because in the first sentence of the lyric ,it have mentioned the subject is “you” and “I”. thirdly, I think translate the onomatopoetic words“啊” into“ah”will be more faithful compared with“come,come,come”.what’s more, I think the last sentences should add a predicate“ is”, it will be more faithful, because the original text have predicate“在”.
Expressiveness: Sometimes, the first principle is held to at the sacrifice of expressiveness and elegance, but this English version has done a very good job, it combined the three principles together, based on faithfulness, nearly all culture elements in the original text have been well reflected, and keep almost all features of the original text.
It sufficiently expresses Sangzang and his disciples’ spirit during their journey to the west to get the Buddhist scriptures in India. Their hardship suffered on the journey, and their courage, faith, and optimism give us great encouragement. This translation has expressed the original text’s spirit very well.
However, there are several points I have to mention, which I don’t think is pretty good. Maybe that’s the contradiction between the two criteria; it’s hard to achieve every single criterion. The translation of”踏平坎坷,成大道”is “overcoming hardship, walking on avenue” I think the original text wants to express that they have suffer a lot and overcame many difficulties, and then, they turn all this difficulties into the walking road to help them in the journey to the west, the original meaning is not walking on avenue, so the translation use “turning it into avenue” will be more appropriate. In addition to that, we all know this text is a lyric, so it can sing by us, when we sing the translated English lyric, it does not sound good.
Elegance: I think this English version put priority on this criterion. I appreciate it very much. First one, we can see that the original text is no more than fifty words, and this English version is also less than fifty English words, it is hard to complete! One of the features of Chinese is succinct, only one words can express a lot of meaning, so does this lyric, but this translation have express all the meaning within very few words. Secondly, the majority of the translation used the present tence.It use phrase instead of sentence, use words instead of phrase, which avoid complicated and overloaded, and made the translation as succinct as the original text.
Conclusion: With the influence of Chinese’s unique habitant, religion, tradition and value, cultural difference have being formed in history between Chinese and western audience. In the translation of Chinese literary works, we need to concern about the difference of two different cultures; on the translation of this lyric, it’s a difficult work to express all the meaning of the text. We have to combine the three criteria together. Although this English version did not translate perfectly, it’s still a good version for foreigner to know more about Chinese culture.