作业帮英语好的大神麻烦帮我修改一下这篇英语作文，批改网检测只有58分
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：综合作业 时间：2024/07/13 12:30:40
英语好的大神麻烦帮我修改一下这篇英语作文，批改网检测只有58分
要写英语作文，内容是关于马云在达沃斯论坛的演讲。我觉得虽然写的一般但不至于只有58啊。。。求大神帮忙改一下，谢谢了。。。要用批改网检测的。。。
Jack Ma has made a speech at the Davos Forum, in which he detailed about his study and entrepreneurial experiences.
I was deeply touched after watching his speech. How can you imagine that the richest man in China was rejected for more than 30 times when he was young? But he never gives up. The man who finally made it to university after passing three examinations for college decided to establish Alibaba, but no one support him. Everybody said:"You won't gain success! Nobody likes your business model! " In 2001, Jack Ma came to the United States to raise 3 million dollars, but he was rejected by many venture capital firms. Now, he came again, but he gets 25 billion dollars.
No one doubts his success now and I think his perseverance has made him what he is today. Jack Ma said:"Always believe in yourself, no matter how others view, always keep it simple and pure. " I share these words with you and let's look at the world in a more positive attitude. I believe we can change the world again!
要写英语作文，内容是关于马云在达沃斯论坛的演讲。我觉得虽然写的一般但不至于只有58啊。。。求大神帮忙改一下，谢谢了。。。要用批改网检测的。。。
Jack Ma has made a speech at the Davos Forum, in which he detailed about his study and entrepreneurial experiences.
I was deeply touched after watching his speech. How can you imagine that the richest man in China was rejected for more than 30 times when he was young? But he never gives up. The man who finally made it to university after passing three examinations for college decided to establish Alibaba, but no one support him. Everybody said:"You won't gain success! Nobody likes your business model! " In 2001, Jack Ma came to the United States to raise 3 million dollars, but he was rejected by many venture capital firms. Now, he came again, but he gets 25 billion dollars.
No one doubts his success now and I think his perseverance has made him what he is today. Jack Ma said:"Always believe in yourself, no matter how others view, always keep it simple and pure. " I share these words with you and let's look at the world in a more positive attitude. I believe we can change the world again!
你有一些小错误，不太细心的结果，已经改好了
Jack Ma has made a speech at the Davos Forum, in which he detailed about his study and entrepreneurial experiences.
I was deeply touched after watching his speech. How could you imagine that the richest man in China was rejected more than 30 times when he was young? But he never gave up. The man who finally managed to go to university after passing the third examinations for college. When he decided to establish Alibaba, but no one supported him. Everybody said:"You won't gain success! Nobody likes your business model! " In 2001, Jack Ma came to the United States to raise 3 million dollars, but he was rejected by many venture capital firms. Now, he comes again, but he gets 25 billion dollars.
No one doubts his success now and I think his perseverance has made him be what he is today. Jack Ma said:"Always believe in yourself, no matter how others view, always keep simple and pure. " I share these words with you and let's look at the world in a more positive attitude. I believe we can change the world again!
Jack Ma has made a speech at the Davos Forum, in which he detailed about his study and entrepreneurial experiences.
I was deeply touched after watching his speech. How could you imagine that the richest man in China was rejected more than 30 times when he was young? But he never gave up. The man who finally managed to go to university after passing the third examinations for college. When he decided to establish Alibaba, but no one supported him. Everybody said:"You won't gain success! Nobody likes your business model! " In 2001, Jack Ma came to the United States to raise 3 million dollars, but he was rejected by many venture capital firms. Now, he comes again, but he gets 25 billion dollars.
No one doubts his success now and I think his perseverance has made him be what he is today. Jack Ma said:"Always believe in yourself, no matter how others view, always keep simple and pure. " I share these words with you and let's look at the world in a more positive attitude. I believe we can change the world again!