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请问,这篇雅思大作文可以拿几分?

来源:学生作业帮 编辑:作业帮 分类:综合作业 时间:2024/07/05 17:13:21
请问,这篇雅思大作文可以拿几分?
It is conceivable that jobs has played a more and more indispensable role in modern people’s daily life,not partly because with competitions becoming increasingly fierce and acute in today’s world,modern people would be more difficult to find a job after graduation,but principally because complex and complicated society urges graduates to enter the society quickly,or they will be abandoned soon by the increasing development of the world.Inversely,there is certainly no denying that universities have no response to help students applying jobs as graduates should tackle their social affairs with their own efforts and as schools are academic places disjoined the society.
To start with,instruct students knowledge is just one part of the function of universities,they also have to educate anthropology which includes how to get a right place in the society.Furthermore,it could be easier to apply a job if the employee had been cultivating some skills; it is estimates that institutions tend to hire employees who is apparent to be trained employing strategies.Last but not least,high employment rate of graduates could help the school win a good reputation.According to a latest survey conducted by the newspaper "Education",the majority of high school students prefer to go to universities which are able to ensure them a bright future.
In brief,it can be surely inferred from what has been debated about that universities should instruct students some strategies of employment,but only if the employees have acquire ample knowledge about theoretical courses,can they find jobs successfully.
能不能有专业点的人详细的评价一下....
唯一的遗憾是没有开头段,很影响最后的打分,虽然中间和结尾写的很好,LINKING WORDS 和 复杂句都会用~个人认为在7左右.