作业帮【一篇高中英语作文 求修改】我写了一篇作文,希望大家热心帮助,提出修改意见,希望大家多多指教,谢谢啦
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/10/04 04:09:56
【一篇高中英语作文 求修改】我写了一篇作文,希望大家热心帮助,提出修改意见,希望大家多多指教,谢谢啦
请以“A Friend of Mine”为题写一篇一百字左右的作文.
玛丽是一个美国女孩,去年四月到沈阳.你跟他相处得很好,很快就成为好朋友.玛丽十分喜爱汉语,而且讲得很好.她擅长数学；在化学课上喜欢动手,但有时粗心大意；物理是他最喜欢的学科之一.她成绩优秀,乐于助人,大家都很喜欢她.
A Friend of Mine
I have a friend,named Mary（named用的对不对?）.She is an American girl.She has come to Shenyang since April last year.I get along well with her.We become good friends with each other.
Mary likes Chinese very much.And she can speak Chinese very well.She is good at math.I think she is very clever.She likes to do chemical experiment,but sometimes she is careless and make mistakes（“在化学课上喜欢动手,但有时粗心大意”这句话有更好的写法吗?）.Physics is her favourite subject.She is good on study.And she likes to help others.We all like her very much.
作文是25分满,不知道我能得多少分,麻烦您给个评价.
非常非常感谢您的支持和帮助
请以“A Friend of Mine”为题写一篇一百字左右的作文.
玛丽是一个美国女孩,去年四月到沈阳.你跟他相处得很好,很快就成为好朋友.玛丽十分喜爱汉语,而且讲得很好.她擅长数学；在化学课上喜欢动手,但有时粗心大意；物理是他最喜欢的学科之一.她成绩优秀,乐于助人,大家都很喜欢她.
A Friend of Mine
I have a friend,named Mary（named用的对不对?）.She is an American girl.She has come to Shenyang since April last year.I get along well with her.We become good friends with each other.
Mary likes Chinese very much.And she can speak Chinese very well.She is good at math.I think she is very clever.She likes to do chemical experiment,but sometimes she is careless and make mistakes（“在化学课上喜欢动手,但有时粗心大意”这句话有更好的写法吗?）.Physics is her favourite subject.She is good on study.And she likes to help others.We all like her very much.
作文是25分满,不知道我能得多少分,麻烦您给个评价.
非常非常感谢您的支持和帮助
还不错,应该在21---22分左右.
两处小毛病.
1 “去年四月到沈阳”应翻译为”She has been in China since April last year."理由是,come一次性动作,不能表示持续状态,be可以.
2.“学习成绩优秀”可以说“She is good at study" 如果你要用good的话,be good at 是固定搭配,用on不妥,这里你可以用“She is excellent in study" .
3.全文都是简单句,我不知道高中阶段的要求,建议你把最后一句改成复合句“Because she is excellent in study and glad to help others we all like her very much."
建议仅供参考,
两处小毛病.
1 “去年四月到沈阳”应翻译为”She has been in China since April last year."理由是,come一次性动作,不能表示持续状态,be可以.
2.“学习成绩优秀”可以说“She is good at study" 如果你要用good的话,be good at 是固定搭配,用on不妥,这里你可以用“She is excellent in study" .
3.全文都是简单句,我不知道高中阶段的要求,建议你把最后一句改成复合句“Because she is excellent in study and glad to help others we all like her very much."
建议仅供参考,
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