作业帮哪位英语高人能帮我检查一下这篇英文电邮
来源：学生作业帮 编辑：作业帮 分类：英语作业 时间：2024/11/06 04:28:07
哪位英语高人能帮我检查一下这篇英文电邮
这是我写给帮我申请暑期实习的一个远亲的邮件,我们之间不是太熟,对方比我大,已工作,是外资企业的白领.我主要想催问一下实习的事怎么说,成了没,还有表达一下即使不成也没关系.希望各位英语达人能帮我检查一下英语表达和内容是否得体,不要表现的我太幼稚.希望大家认真看看,
Hi XXX
It's July and I'm in my summer vacation in NJ now.How are you?
My vacation lasts about 2 months till 27th,August and besides getting an intership,I also would like to take some Germany classes which could last for a month.Therefore I would appreciate it if you can tell me how is the case going and the general time of the intership so I can arrange my time.
However,if my application is rejected or there doesn't seem to be a chance this time,It'll be OK,as the most important thing to me is learning more wherever I am.I will try to find myself a part-time job in NJ.
By the way,take care of yourself during the hot summer.
Looking forward to your feedback.
Have a nice day.
XXX
这是我写给帮我申请暑期实习的一个远亲的邮件,我们之间不是太熟,对方比我大,已工作,是外资企业的白领.我主要想催问一下实习的事怎么说,成了没,还有表达一下即使不成也没关系.希望各位英语达人能帮我检查一下英语表达和内容是否得体,不要表现的我太幼稚.希望大家认真看看,
Hi XXX
It's July and I'm in my summer vacation in NJ now.How are you?
My vacation lasts about 2 months till 27th,August and besides getting an intership,I also would like to take some Germany classes which could last for a month.Therefore I would appreciate it if you can tell me how is the case going and the general time of the intership so I can arrange my time.
However,if my application is rejected or there doesn't seem to be a chance this time,It'll be OK,as the most important thing to me is learning more wherever I am.I will try to find myself a part-time job in NJ.
By the way,take care of yourself during the hot summer.
Looking forward to your feedback.
Have a nice day.
XXX
既然不太熟,还是用Dear好些.
How are you? 应该放在It's July 的前面,先问候再说自己的事.
intership似是internship,但除非你是学医的,否则用 summer job, 或其它的词.
Germany似乎是German, 德语.
can tell me 改成could...更礼貌.
how is the case改成how my application is 语序调整；用application 更具体.
if my application...改成虚拟语气Should my application be rejected or should there not seem to...(这个后面的有点别扭,你看着办,要不就删掉.)
How are you? 应该放在It's July 的前面,先问候再说自己的事.
intership似是internship,但除非你是学医的,否则用 summer job, 或其它的词.
Germany似乎是German, 德语.
can tell me 改成could...更礼貌.
how is the case改成how my application is 语序调整；用application 更具体.
if my application...改成虚拟语气Should my application be rejected or should there not seem to...(这个后面的有点别扭,你看着办,要不就删掉.)